One of the toughest parts of my awakening was the loss of friends. I watched people leave my life one by one and was increasingly depressed, though I knew I was blossoming. I eventually realized that as an unhealthy, unaware human being I attracted those who played their role. The loss of friends paled in comparison to the realization that I had lost my ability to be close with my daughters. The only time in my whole life I truly felt unconditionally loved was raising my girls. They were my world and now I had to let them go. I had to continue down this winding road and allow God to bring me the solutions to a better, stronger relationship with them. I was tortured with thoughts that I had lost them forever, that I had lost their love. I would have done anything to know they still loved me; anything but be distracted from my path.

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eroded sand castle

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